For those of you out there who have ever watched a game of tennis with me, I would think you would know of my love for the expression "What the deuce". If you don't watch tennis, then you may not see the hillariousness of this pun. I will quickly explain it in lamen's terms. A deuce can occur in tennis when the score in a game is 40-40 (oh know, at least I think that's what it is). So often when a deuce occurs in a tennis match (which is not rare), I will use this phrase.
Now no matter how much I enjoy this quote in the tennis context and no matter that I am watching tennis right now (Wimbledon), I do not want you to think that this is the only thing that I am connecting this phrase to. What I really felt like using this quote for today was to mark the end of my Grade 12 convocation this morning. Yes, morning. Thats all it lasted for. My high school is one of the largest schools of em all and the ceremony was a mere 2.5 hours long. I was so shocked that I felt like saying, "What the deuce?" It was just so strange. I was expecting to be bored. I was expecting to want to sleep and be tired throughout the whole thing. But you want to know what? Yes, I thought you would guess. I wasn't even bored except for right at the start during a few silly speeches.
Some of the reasons I enjoyed it so much were because of the Valedictorian speech and because I never knew it could be so fun to see people walk across that stage of success that I recognized. Oh my, our valedictorian had an amazing speech. At first, she was talking about how there was no speech that could sum up high school for all of our graduates because we were all so diverse. So she said, "why don't you just talk amongst yourselves for the remaining 5 minutes." I was scared that was actually what her speech was going to consist of. But then she went on to explain each of her attempts and what aspects they included but each time, she got caught up on the ending, so she would crumple up her paper and throw it in a different direction. It was so great! At the end she told us that we needed to write our own ending and it was just so interesting and not the typical valedictorian speech. I absolutely loved it. I thought it was awesome how everyone clapped for her too. It was awesome.
I am also saying "What the deuce?" that I graduated. I mean, high school is over. How can this be? I don't feel ready to be done and yet, I no longer have to go to that place ever again. I just don't understand. I really can't comprehend it at this time. Yet, I have walked across the stage, I have received my piece of paper that says I graduated, and I have all of the "tools" as they say, to go out and make something of myself. Still, I feel like I have not enough. I don't feel mature enough to move into this scary world we live in. It's too big, there's too much to be done, I feel so insignificant.
But I do know that things will carry on. I am praying to know what my role is and where I really fit into this puzzle of God's. And even though I'm scared and shocked about this big step I am making, I am confident that God will give me hints as to where I should go from here, because I know that we all have specific abilities that he gives us that no one else has. So eve though it's scary, it's also somehow a bit exciting too. I want to focus on that aspect.
Friday, June 27, 2008
Friday, June 20, 2008
Tinkliness in Your Stomach
Hello there my friends. Well, you (some more than others) may be completely furious that you could not find a blog post from me from yesterday, June 19th. So I will give you my reason which may not satisfy some of you. But "I'll take a whack at it" (bonus points for you if you know where thats from). The reason is that I felt a strange tinkliness in my stomach that made me feel majorly nauseous. This is my reason. Now I will say sorry and I ask you with a "pretty" in front of my please to forgive me. If someone's tinkliness in their stomach does not count as a good enough reason to not blog, than I am even more sorry. But what else can I really do? Na much.
So I hear that there are quite a few people of late who have had this same or very similar stomach experiences. My doctor told me just today to keep to "friendly foods". So I will try, but pizza does smell very good right now. He didn't list pizza on the friendly foods list... oh what a dilemma. Alright well I'm going to go off and figure out some friendly foods. Once again, I'm sorry, and I will try to make it up to my most avid fans.
So I hear that there are quite a few people of late who have had this same or very similar stomach experiences. My doctor told me just today to keep to "friendly foods". So I will try, but pizza does smell very good right now. He didn't list pizza on the friendly foods list... oh what a dilemma. Alright well I'm going to go off and figure out some friendly foods. Once again, I'm sorry, and I will try to make it up to my most avid fans.
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
The Silliness of Dread
If you haven't experienced the feeling that people commonly refer to as "dread", than I wonder if you are a for real human being. Well, as it says in the title, this dread thing is super silly. Funny how that is exactly what I wanted to say about dread and that is what the title of this somehow turned out to be.
"Why is dread so silly?" this is a question that I'll bet a lot of you folks are wanting to phrase to me at this very moment. Well, I'm glad you asked that, because that is where I was going with this blog writing at this moment. Dread is so silly because you can spend a whack load (which is equivalent to x number of hours) just thinking about something that may or may not happen. And it always seems like in the end, you wish you hadn't have spent x number of hours dreading. In my opinion, dread is much if not exactly the same as worrying. One can let themselves get all down about their situation or a possible situation to come. They will worry and dread and just not look forward to something that is in the future. In my experience, these dreaded items or events either don't occur or they are so much better than I ever could have imagined. Later, I wonder to myself I wonder, "Why the heck did I spend x number of hours dreading that?" Perhaps these thoughts have come to you too? Oh come on admit it. I believe they come to all of us at one point or another. Some of us more than others.
I think of myself as an expert worrier. A Worry Wart or perhaps a Dreading Delilah? Something of the sort anyway. There have been so many times that I have worried or dreaded something to come. I am not proud of how many hours I have wasted thinking unpositive thoughts when I could be praying for a right attitude. I do believe that God wants us to seize each moment, and how can you make the most of each moment when you are down about something to come? I don't think you can.
I am thinking of this right now because tomorrow I am going to an outreach center and I have been there before. I never look forward to it and unfortunately, I am always happy for it to be over. However, every time when it is over, I am so glad that I went, because it was a good thing to do plus it was even fun. So why do I always still not look forward to it? Good question.
I heard once that when you worry, you aren't putting Jesus at your center. Yes, I think the act of not worrying/dreading is something that people have to work on, some people have to work harder than others. However, I think that if you are committed to praying and seeking God for help with your positive attitude, you can live for each moment and make far better use of your time. I am definitely trying to seek God for help with this silly business with dread, but it is something that I catch myself getting stuck in from time to time.
Also, I thought of something just now. If you are caught in the feeling of dread, you may be locked. So one might refer to you as a "Dread locked" person. Ha. That's funny right?
"Why is dread so silly?" this is a question that I'll bet a lot of you folks are wanting to phrase to me at this very moment. Well, I'm glad you asked that, because that is where I was going with this blog writing at this moment. Dread is so silly because you can spend a whack load (which is equivalent to x number of hours) just thinking about something that may or may not happen. And it always seems like in the end, you wish you hadn't have spent x number of hours dreading. In my opinion, dread is much if not exactly the same as worrying. One can let themselves get all down about their situation or a possible situation to come. They will worry and dread and just not look forward to something that is in the future. In my experience, these dreaded items or events either don't occur or they are so much better than I ever could have imagined. Later, I wonder to myself I wonder, "Why the heck did I spend x number of hours dreading that?" Perhaps these thoughts have come to you too? Oh come on admit it. I believe they come to all of us at one point or another. Some of us more than others.
I think of myself as an expert worrier. A Worry Wart or perhaps a Dreading Delilah? Something of the sort anyway. There have been so many times that I have worried or dreaded something to come. I am not proud of how many hours I have wasted thinking unpositive thoughts when I could be praying for a right attitude. I do believe that God wants us to seize each moment, and how can you make the most of each moment when you are down about something to come? I don't think you can.
I am thinking of this right now because tomorrow I am going to an outreach center and I have been there before. I never look forward to it and unfortunately, I am always happy for it to be over. However, every time when it is over, I am so glad that I went, because it was a good thing to do plus it was even fun. So why do I always still not look forward to it? Good question.
I heard once that when you worry, you aren't putting Jesus at your center. Yes, I think the act of not worrying/dreading is something that people have to work on, some people have to work harder than others. However, I think that if you are committed to praying and seeking God for help with your positive attitude, you can live for each moment and make far better use of your time. I am definitely trying to seek God for help with this silly business with dread, but it is something that I catch myself getting stuck in from time to time.
Also, I thought of something just now. If you are caught in the feeling of dread, you may be locked. So one might refer to you as a "Dread locked" person. Ha. That's funny right?
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Did I mention I love Shakespeare?
Did I mention that I love Shakespeare? I think so. Yes. Well tonight I went to go see "The Taming of the Shrew" at a fun little event called "Shakespeare in the Park" which is a very accurate and appropriate title for what it was. It is held at Assiniboine Park. It is really neat because you go to the Conservatory and pick up Lawn chairs and then you start off by some trees outside. That is where the first scene is set up. Then the next scene you go into the conservatory. Then you get an intermission and afterwards you go out to a tent scene in another wilderness setting and finally it ends off back in the conservatory. It was so much fun and I had many a laugh.
Something I find interesting is all of the fuss going on about this play. Apparently the idea of women submitting to their husbands is something that some are finding offensive. Yes, this play does have a lot of talk of women submitting. In fact, it ends off with the one woman who had been headstrong throughout the play, giving a speech about how women are meant to answer to their husbands every need. Don't get me wrong. I'm not arguing that women should or should not be the homemaker, chore doer or anything of the sort. I am only saying one simple thing; Had this play been written within the last 25 years, yes, I might possibly be a bit "put off" by the subject matter (although maybe not even then). However, this play was written long, long time ago. In Shakespeare's time for crying out loud. So for this reason alone, I don't think that anyone needs to be offended and think all these thoughts that it is bad for women's reputation or what not. Also, with all of the extreme statements that Shakespeare had Katherine (the headstrong submitter) say, I don't even think in his time that he was at all meaning this to be taken seriously about women. This play is a comedy and not a tragedy after all and should be taken as such in my opinion.
Well yes. That's my opinion you are very open to your own and if you want to give me a piece of your mind, go write on ahead a comment on this blog post. I think it is a very fun play to go watch and I didn't understand all of the Shakepearean lingo but it was still just so enjoyable.
Oh and by the way; sorry for writing in that gross blue yesterday. I regret that already.
Something I find interesting is all of the fuss going on about this play. Apparently the idea of women submitting to their husbands is something that some are finding offensive. Yes, this play does have a lot of talk of women submitting. In fact, it ends off with the one woman who had been headstrong throughout the play, giving a speech about how women are meant to answer to their husbands every need. Don't get me wrong. I'm not arguing that women should or should not be the homemaker, chore doer or anything of the sort. I am only saying one simple thing; Had this play been written within the last 25 years, yes, I might possibly be a bit "put off" by the subject matter (although maybe not even then). However, this play was written long, long time ago. In Shakespeare's time for crying out loud. So for this reason alone, I don't think that anyone needs to be offended and think all these thoughts that it is bad for women's reputation or what not. Also, with all of the extreme statements that Shakespeare had Katherine (the headstrong submitter) say, I don't even think in his time that he was at all meaning this to be taken seriously about women. This play is a comedy and not a tragedy after all and should be taken as such in my opinion.
Well yes. That's my opinion you are very open to your own and if you want to give me a piece of your mind, go write on ahead a comment on this blog post. I think it is a very fun play to go watch and I didn't understand all of the Shakepearean lingo but it was still just so enjoyable.
Oh and by the way; sorry for writing in that gross blue yesterday. I regret that already.
Monday, June 16, 2008
My New Crush
I bet that a good sum of you readers out there are laughing your heads off thinking of amazing ways that you can use this gossip of my newest love. Well for your sake I hope you do share this with everyone I ever talk to. Don't worry. I won't be hurt. Now you are probably thinking that it is not nearly as fun to share this since I am completely encouraging it. However, still do please.
Now I will bring forth my "secret". I say "secret" because how secretive can I really be if I am writing it down on my blog? Answer: Not very. So here goes, I absolutely adore Hamlet!! He is a thoroughly enjoyable read. I really miss discussing him in my English class (what? I do? I do!). I also miss writing up my Reading Response Logs and writing my extra scene. That was probably my favorite part of Hamlet this year. Oh how I miss him.
The reason I felt I needed to bring this forth is because on my very hilarious "About me" on your left hand side, I described myself as one who wasn't a Shakespeare fan per say. However, this year I realized that I am just not a Macbeth fan. Shakespeare in general I believe is something I very much enjoy. I especially enjoy theatrically reading it with a person who shares my passion for doing different voices. I really recommend that if you have never theatrically read a Shakespeare play with someone, you are definitely missing a crucial stepping stone in your life. Do it as soon as possible. Then tell me about it.
Hmmm... thinking of Hamlet now makes me smile. My favorite quote that exits Hamlet's lips is soon after Ophelia's death (sorry if I ruined that "surprise" in this tragedy). It is when Hamlet and Horatio are talking near Ophelia's funeral procession. Hamlet does not yet know that she has died. When he finds out, he comes out of hiding and Laertes accuses him of having a part in Ophelia's death. Hamlet yells at him with tears in his eyes (in the Branagh version) "I loved Ophelia. 40 000 brothers could not have loved her with my quantity of love!" Something like that anyway. It is at this point that we realize Hamlet does actually love Ophelia. I cried at this point in the movie representation. Why didn't Hamlet tell Ophelia of his true feelings? Why was he so cruel to her, telling her to get to a nunnery?? They were meant for each other and even though I do love him, I still would have liked them to end up together.
Another favorite part in Hamlet is when he is pretending to be mad. Polonius is talking to him and finally Polonius asks Hamlet if he may take his leave. Hamlet replies my saying, "There is nothing I would more rather part with." Hamlet made me laugh. He definitely was very clever and so very witty. What a guy.
In our English class, we discussed at the end different parts. One thing that I found very interesting was when we talked about how we got the description for Ophelia's "watery death". When we talked about it more, that is when I realized that a character must have been watching her so that this description could have come forth. The only person who is really at all linked to perhaps seeing her death is Horatio. This is because a scene or two earlier the queen asked him to follow her. However, if Horatio was watching her at this point, why didn't he try to save her? Because of all of her petticoats, it would have taken quite a while for her to sink. But Horatio is a nice, upstanding guy. I have full confidence that he wouldn't knowingly let Ophelia die. Therefore, I don't believe that Horatio was the one that brought forth the description. I believe it is a mystery.
Well I think I've shared the parts of Hamlet that I specifically enjoyed or found interesting. I hope you did too because I sort of started rambling while good memories came back. I'm very excited because tomorrow I am going to see "The Taming of the Shrew" at "Shakespeare in the Park". I will most likely blog about it afterwards. So if this Shakespeare stuff has bored you to tears you may want to stay away from this page for a while. However, if you have found my ramblings intriguing, I am very very glad and giddy.
So I hope you enjoyed hearing about my crush. I also hope you enjoyed that it was written in blue.
Now I will bring forth my "secret". I say "secret" because how secretive can I really be if I am writing it down on my blog? Answer: Not very. So here goes, I absolutely adore Hamlet!! He is a thoroughly enjoyable read. I really miss discussing him in my English class (what? I do? I do!). I also miss writing up my Reading Response Logs and writing my extra scene. That was probably my favorite part of Hamlet this year. Oh how I miss him.
The reason I felt I needed to bring this forth is because on my very hilarious "About me" on your left hand side, I described myself as one who wasn't a Shakespeare fan per say. However, this year I realized that I am just not a Macbeth fan. Shakespeare in general I believe is something I very much enjoy. I especially enjoy theatrically reading it with a person who shares my passion for doing different voices. I really recommend that if you have never theatrically read a Shakespeare play with someone, you are definitely missing a crucial stepping stone in your life. Do it as soon as possible. Then tell me about it.
Hmmm... thinking of Hamlet now makes me smile. My favorite quote that exits Hamlet's lips is soon after Ophelia's death (sorry if I ruined that "surprise" in this tragedy). It is when Hamlet and Horatio are talking near Ophelia's funeral procession. Hamlet does not yet know that she has died. When he finds out, he comes out of hiding and Laertes accuses him of having a part in Ophelia's death. Hamlet yells at him with tears in his eyes (in the Branagh version) "I loved Ophelia. 40 000 brothers could not have loved her with my quantity of love!" Something like that anyway. It is at this point that we realize Hamlet does actually love Ophelia. I cried at this point in the movie representation. Why didn't Hamlet tell Ophelia of his true feelings? Why was he so cruel to her, telling her to get to a nunnery?? They were meant for each other and even though I do love him, I still would have liked them to end up together.
Another favorite part in Hamlet is when he is pretending to be mad. Polonius is talking to him and finally Polonius asks Hamlet if he may take his leave. Hamlet replies my saying, "There is nothing I would more rather part with." Hamlet made me laugh. He definitely was very clever and so very witty. What a guy.
In our English class, we discussed at the end different parts. One thing that I found very interesting was when we talked about how we got the description for Ophelia's "watery death". When we talked about it more, that is when I realized that a character must have been watching her so that this description could have come forth. The only person who is really at all linked to perhaps seeing her death is Horatio. This is because a scene or two earlier the queen asked him to follow her. However, if Horatio was watching her at this point, why didn't he try to save her? Because of all of her petticoats, it would have taken quite a while for her to sink. But Horatio is a nice, upstanding guy. I have full confidence that he wouldn't knowingly let Ophelia die. Therefore, I don't believe that Horatio was the one that brought forth the description. I believe it is a mystery.
Well I think I've shared the parts of Hamlet that I specifically enjoyed or found interesting. I hope you did too because I sort of started rambling while good memories came back. I'm very excited because tomorrow I am going to see "The Taming of the Shrew" at "Shakespeare in the Park". I will most likely blog about it afterwards. So if this Shakespeare stuff has bored you to tears you may want to stay away from this page for a while. However, if you have found my ramblings intriguing, I am very very glad and giddy.
So I hope you enjoyed hearing about my crush. I also hope you enjoyed that it was written in blue.
Saturday, June 14, 2008
The Surprise of my Life!
I am experiencing the surprise of my life at this very moment. Actually, all week I've been experiencing it. Do you know what this surprise is called? I didn't think so. I will tell you; it's named Graduation. Now you may be thinking to yourself; "wow, is this girl so stupid that she didn't expect to graduate?" or you might be thinking something like, "why is she so surprised. That's life! For goodness sake!" or you may even be thinking up some profane insult to throw my way for being so surprised. However, I have a feeling that some of you may understand this surprising and utterly strange feeling of confusion that this time in one's life can bring. So I thank those who think those thoughts.
Now I will proceed to trying to explain what is going on in my head. You see, ever since grade ten, I have felt "ready" to leave high school. I remember just waiting and waiting for this time. Yet, now that is has arrived, I suddenly feel unwilling to move on. I have come to love this imperfect place. It is ironic that it always happens at the end of a phase that we reflect on our experiences and feel thankful. It is only now that I see a fuller picture of my experiences. It is now that I learn that I love high school. I have been so blessed and I don't want to move on. Tres ironique.
God has amazing plans in store for us. I realize now that these three years in high school have been a big part of those amazing plans. He has an incredible way of making things so much better than you could hope for. I will give an example that at this time feels very significant. It is called "My Grade 12 English class". Here's a bit of background. I have always hated English class. Okay, hate is a strong word, yet I do feel that it is very close to my actual feelings. When I moved into my second semester, it contained English and I was extremely miserable at the thought of having to write and be marked on it and be with a class where I didn't really know anyone. However, I needed this course to graduate so being the smart girl that I am, I decided that I would just stay in the course no matter how much I dreaded it each day. To my utter amazement, even with this horrible attitude, I gradually started looking forward to english! Of all the crazy things. I would have always said that the day I enjoyed English, chickens would have teeth (that is a french saying that I learned this year and did not understand). But now I realize that not only did I enjoy this class, but I met so many new people and we grew so close in that English class setting. We had so many oppertunities to get to know each other and it never would have happened it I hadn't been in this class. It is grade 12 English class that I am missing already. That is shocking but true. I am so blessed that I could have those experiences.
So now I have come to realize that I am not ready but am being forced to leave this place I have surprisingly grown to enjoy. I have made so many great friends, some who are life long friends. I will miss this life free of me having to make decisions. However, just like God provided for me at this time, I know and am trusting that he has many more amazing things in store for me next year. So I am trying with all my heart to put all of my trust and worries on him and his amazing strength and knowledge.
Now I will proceed to trying to explain what is going on in my head. You see, ever since grade ten, I have felt "ready" to leave high school. I remember just waiting and waiting for this time. Yet, now that is has arrived, I suddenly feel unwilling to move on. I have come to love this imperfect place. It is ironic that it always happens at the end of a phase that we reflect on our experiences and feel thankful. It is only now that I see a fuller picture of my experiences. It is now that I learn that I love high school. I have been so blessed and I don't want to move on. Tres ironique.
God has amazing plans in store for us. I realize now that these three years in high school have been a big part of those amazing plans. He has an incredible way of making things so much better than you could hope for. I will give an example that at this time feels very significant. It is called "My Grade 12 English class". Here's a bit of background. I have always hated English class. Okay, hate is a strong word, yet I do feel that it is very close to my actual feelings. When I moved into my second semester, it contained English and I was extremely miserable at the thought of having to write and be marked on it and be with a class where I didn't really know anyone. However, I needed this course to graduate so being the smart girl that I am, I decided that I would just stay in the course no matter how much I dreaded it each day. To my utter amazement, even with this horrible attitude, I gradually started looking forward to english! Of all the crazy things. I would have always said that the day I enjoyed English, chickens would have teeth (that is a french saying that I learned this year and did not understand). But now I realize that not only did I enjoy this class, but I met so many new people and we grew so close in that English class setting. We had so many oppertunities to get to know each other and it never would have happened it I hadn't been in this class. It is grade 12 English class that I am missing already. That is shocking but true. I am so blessed that I could have those experiences.
So now I have come to realize that I am not ready but am being forced to leave this place I have surprisingly grown to enjoy. I have made so many great friends, some who are life long friends. I will miss this life free of me having to make decisions. However, just like God provided for me at this time, I know and am trusting that he has many more amazing things in store for me next year. So I am trying with all my heart to put all of my trust and worries on him and his amazing strength and knowledge.
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