The Surprise of my Life!

I am experiencing the surprise of my life at this very moment. Actually, all week I've been experiencing it. Do you know what this surprise is called? I didn't think so. I will tell you; it's named Graduation. Now you may be thinking to yourself; "wow, is this girl so stupid that she didn't expect to graduate?" or you might be thinking something like, "why is she so surprised. That's life! For goodness sake!" or you may even be thinking up some profane insult to throw my way for being so surprised. However, I have a feeling that some of you may understand this surprising and utterly strange feeling of confusion that this time in one's life can bring. So I thank those who think those thoughts.
Now I will proceed to trying to explain what is going on in my head. You see, ever since grade ten, I have felt "ready" to leave high school. I remember just waiting and waiting for this time. Yet, now that is has arrived, I suddenly feel unwilling to move on. I have come to love this imperfect place. It is ironic that it always happens at the end of a phase that we reflect on our experiences and feel thankful. It is only now that I see a fuller picture of my experiences. It is now that I learn that I love high school. I have been so blessed and I don't want to move on. Tres ironique.
God has amazing plans in store for us. I realize now that these three years in high school have been a big part of those amazing plans. He has an incredible way of making things so much better than you could hope for. I will give an example that at this time feels very significant. It is called "My Grade 12 English class". Here's a bit of background. I have always hated English class. Okay, hate is a strong word, yet I do feel that it is very close to my actual feelings. When I moved into my second semester, it contained English and I was extremely miserable at the thought of having to write and be marked on it and be with a class where I didn't really know anyone. However, I needed this course to graduate so being the smart girl that I am, I decided that I would just stay in the course no matter how much I dreaded it each day. To my utter amazement, even with this horrible attitude, I gradually started looking forward to english! Of all the crazy things. I would have always said that the day I enjoyed English, chickens would have teeth (that is a french saying that I learned this year and did not understand). But now I realize that not only did I enjoy this class, but I met so many new people and we grew so close in that English class setting. We had so many oppertunities to get to know each other and it never would have happened it I hadn't been in this class. It is grade 12 English class that I am missing already. That is shocking but true. I am so blessed that I could have those experiences.
So now I have come to realize that I am not ready but am being forced to leave this place I have surprisingly grown to enjoy. I have made so many great friends, some who are life long friends. I will miss this life free of me having to make decisions. However, just like God provided for me at this time, I know and am trusting that he has many more amazing things in store for me next year. So I am trying with all my heart to put all of my trust and worries on him and his amazing strength and knowledge.