What the Deuce?

For those of you out there who have ever watched a game of tennis with me, I would think you would know of my love for the expression "What the deuce". If you don't watch tennis, then you may not see the hillariousness of this pun. I will quickly explain it in lamen's terms. A deuce can occur in tennis when the score in a game is 40-40 (oh know, at least I think that's what it is). So often when a deuce occurs in a tennis match (which is not rare), I will use this phrase.

Now no matter how much I enjoy this quote in the tennis context and no matter that I am watching tennis right now (Wimbledon), I do not want you to think that this is the only thing that I am connecting this phrase to. What I really felt like using this quote for today was to mark the end of my Grade 12 convocation this morning. Yes, morning. Thats all it lasted for. My high school is one of the largest schools of em all and the ceremony was a mere 2.5 hours long. I was so shocked that I felt like saying, "What the deuce?" It was just so strange. I was expecting to be bored. I was expecting to want to sleep and be tired throughout the whole thing. But you want to know what? Yes, I thought you would guess. I wasn't even bored except for right at the start during a few silly speeches.

Some of the reasons I enjoyed it so much were because of the Valedictorian speech and because I never knew it could be so fun to see people walk across that stage of success that I recognized. Oh my, our valedictorian had an amazing speech. At first, she was talking about how there was no speech that could sum up high school for all of our graduates because we were all so diverse. So she said, "why don't you just talk amongst yourselves for the remaining 5 minutes." I was scared that was actually what her speech was going to consist of. But then she went on to explain each of her attempts and what aspects they included but each time, she got caught up on the ending, so she would crumple up her paper and throw it in a different direction. It was so great! At the end she told us that we needed to write our own ending and it was just so interesting and not the typical valedictorian speech. I absolutely loved it. I thought it was awesome how everyone clapped for her too. It was awesome.

I am also saying "What the deuce?" that I graduated. I mean, high school is over. How can this be? I don't feel ready to be done and yet, I no longer have to go to that place ever again. I just don't understand. I really can't comprehend it at this time. Yet, I have walked across the stage, I have received my piece of paper that says I graduated, and I have all of the "tools" as they say, to go out and make something of myself. Still, I feel like I have not enough. I don't feel mature enough to move into this scary world we live in. It's too big, there's too much to be done, I feel so insignificant.

But I do know that things will carry on. I am praying to know what my role is and where I really fit into this puzzle of God's. And even though I'm scared and shocked about this big step I am making, I am confident that God will give me hints as to where I should go from here, because I know that we all have specific abilities that he gives us that no one else has. So eve though it's scary, it's also somehow a bit exciting too. I want to focus on that aspect.